Woes Of A Wedding Attender

Me on the left with the wedding drama unfolding behind me!

Attending a friend's wedding is always a bitter-sweet experience I think. Bitter if you don't already sport a (very) shiny stone on your finger (or for that matter, a dashing man on your arm). Sweet, because of course you are happy your chum's 'settling down in life' (always hated that phrase - it sounds like you're compromising or something of the sort). But before I move on, I want to rewind back and explain the bitter bit better (tongue-twister not intended but also not regretted). So what makes the experience of attending a wedding when I'm not married bitter? It's when people (those you haven't seen in years) unabashedly and very righteously ask you 'what're your plans in life', a question which so skilfully masks the real query which is: 'You sorry thing, you're not yet married?'. These questions always leave me wondering a) if I should bother responding or, b) if I should really bother responding.

Just fresh out of having attended a lavish wedding, my head churns out another thought - meeting people after a really long time and catching up with them (as was traditionally fun) has now lost its charm, thank you Facebook. Gathered around in food and drink around a table, a bunch of us met for the first time since we graduated from college (a good seven years later). Pleasantries were exchanged, the 'bitter question' asked, the obvious 'where are you working' (so we can judge whether you're doing well in life or not) question asked, following which the group moves on to discussing other friends absent from the wedding...and then silence. A few awkward glances here and bouts of silence there. I take comfort in gazing at my plate of food. I don't quite need to ask Friend A how he's been because he's already shared his recent travel pictures on Facebook. I don't feel the need to ask Friend B where she works because she updated her job info on her Facebook profile. I don't show surprise/shock that Friend C got married, because I saw the entire picture album on Facebook. And I'm sure no one needs to ask me what I've been eating lately...as someone at the wedding told me, and I might add, in an almost frustrated tone, that my food pictures spam his newsfeed! Friends, what I am trying to say is that Facebook has taken out the joy in catching up with old faces. Without saying anything, so much has been shared. People have become experts on other people's life happenings. We have championed and accepted this information overload. That weddings are a great excuse to have a reunion, I don't necessarily believe in. Facebook even makes me wonder about the most silliest thing like whether I can repeat an outfit at someone else's wedding, because everyone would've already seen me wear it in another wedding album on Facebook. Stupid right? 

One thing I so look forward to at weddings is the food. But the abundance of it makes me sick and my appetite almost wanes looking at the sheer spread lining the four walls of a gigantic banquet hall. A little bite here and a 'littler' gulp of a drink there and I'm pretty much sorted. What a pity! Why tummy, why? I always end up thinking of how much more of the chole-kulcha I could've downed following a short curse under my breath at myself for having not eaten much of it the previous day! And the desserts...I shouldn't even begin.

Having returned from the Delhi wedding only last night, I can't really hear what anyone is saying at work because my ears are still reeling with the deafening sounds of fireworks and 'band baaja' at the 'baarat'. But by the end of reading this blog post please reader, don't think I am a marital grinch. I love attending weddings, and partly because I get invited to so few of them. And I can bear anything, I repeat, anything(even spending hours in the outdoor venue braving the blistering February cold of Delhi) to attend my dearest friend's wedding. 

I'm fatigued, maybe my make-up is still not completely off, but time to get back to pretending like I'm working now...just because!